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January 10, 2007

Choosing to Dwell on the Positive Memories

I remember. . .

Driving with my parents down to Charleston, IL to see my brother in an original musical at Eastern Illinois University. It was a show with three characters: Adam, Eve, and the snake. My brother played the snake with sly, sinister savvy.

Traveling to Virginia to see my brother’s show at Busch Gardens. He sang and danced in the German-themed Oktoberfest show. I watched that show over and over again, getting selected by my brother and his performer friends every time they grabbed audience members for a polka. This is the only reason I can sing along today to Ein Prosit at any German festival.

Singing a karaoke duet with my brother at his wedding reception. My performance sucked (and there is, unfortunately, video to prove it) but it was a fun night.

Dancing with my Dad at my wedding while my brother tossed out “encouragement” such as “Cut a rug, Walter”.

And I am very thankful that our whole family was together for my parent’s 40th anniversary party in October.

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October 31, 2006

Suprise, Surprise!

The second event of our long Columbus Day weekend was a surprise 40th anniversary party that my brothers and I threw for our parents. My parents knew Steve and I were going to be in town; the reunion was our alibi. The "plan" was that we were going to meet my brother (Gg) and sister-in-law (C) for dinner at a local restaurant. It was my responsibility to be sure that my parents did not arrive at the restaurant before 6:00.

This was quite challenging. First of all, I drove to my parent's house from Bloomington, breaking land speed records as we went. So we got to my parent's house a bit earlier than expected. My mom suggested we call Gg and see if they could come a little earlier than 6:00. My dad said he thought they were busy doing something that afternoon and couldn't make it before 6:00. As with many moments in the preceding weeks, I was sure my parents were on to us.

Then my mom thought that we should get to the restaurant early to put our names in so we wouldn't have to wait for a table once Gg and C got there. It was time for drastic action. With a mere 45 minutes before we were supposed to leave for the restaurant, I pulled the "where's all my stuff from college?" routine. I headed downstairs to rifle through boxes of old crap, frustrating my mother no end.

My mom started making noises that we needed to get going, even suggesting that I might be being a little insensitive and rude to potentially keep my brother waiting. Finally, it was within 5 minutes of when we needed to go, so I gave in and off we went. I spent the entire drive nervously looking at the clock, terrified we’d get to the restaurant too early and see guests in the parking lot.

Fortunately, all of the guests got there early and my parents walked in to a complete surprise. We had managed to get contact information for a variety of my parents friends, my aunt and uncle were there, and my other brother (Gf) who lives in Florida was there, too.

The event went just perfectly; I couldn't have hoped for better really. Here are my parents cutting the cake.

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When we got home that evening, I gave my parents a gift I was really quite excited about, and I can't recommend this company highly enough. My parents were married something like 3 or 4 months after they met. (Scary) It was a small affair and they didn't have a professional photographer. So, I had a few faded, 40-year-old snapshots. I sent these to myDaVinci and they created a wonderful 8x10, framed, hand-drawn portrait from one of the pictures. (We went with the DaVinci sketch.) My parents finally have a wedding picture to hang on the wall. And Steve and I are thinking about having one of our own wedding photos drawn. Really, if you are looking for a great gift idea for a special event, myDaVinci is a great choice. (And, no, the real picture does not say myDaVinci across the bottom.)

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So, happy anniversary Mom and Dad! Hope you enjoyed the party, 'cause I don't think we'll be able to pull off a surprise like that again.

July 23, 2006

A Daddy's Girl Speaks

It has been a scary few weeks. In June, my dad had a Transient Ischemic Attack (TIA). TIAs can be a precursor to a big honkin' stroke. When I first heard this, I started doing a little research on TIAs and found that more than a third of people who have a TIA will have a stroke.

I calmed down a little bit after his doctor in Illinois proclaimed that a wait-and-see approach was in order, but then my dad got a second opinion from an acquaintance of his who is an internationally renowned stroke guy. My dad worked for 25 years at Abbott Labs and for a good portion of that time he worked on stroke med studies. He still has a lot of contacts in the field and Dr. Higashida was one of them. Dr. Higashida told my dad that he thought the condition was more severe and that a procedure was in order. So my parents scheduled the trip out to UCSF.

My dad's work at Abbott was a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, he knew the signs and symptoms and was able to get medical help right away. He also knew a specialist in whom he had great confidence. On the other hand, my dad knew all too well what a massive stroke would do to him. Add to this the fact that his mother died of a stroke (a subject we never mentioned over the last month) and he was a bit of a nervous wreck.

At any rate, he had his stent procedure on Monday, spent Tuesday in a regular hospital room, and was released on Wednesday. As I said to a friend, let's snake a thread from your leg to your brain, insert a foreign object in your one good vertebral artery, and send you home less than 48 hours later. Amazing!

Or, as I said to another friend, after the dramatic and tense lead-up to the procedure, seeing my dad sitting on my sofa 2 days later, looking perfectly normal, I quoted from Buffy:

"Big overture, little show."

In addition to his good luck in knowing Dr. Higashida and being able to afford a trip to UCSF, the other stroke of luck (no pun intended) is, of course, that I live in the San Francisco Bay Area. So, my parents stayed at my place before and after the procedure.

After the recap, I get to the meat of this post. In the days leading up to the planned procedure (which had definite scary risks), I tried to keep a positive outlook, but it wasn't always easy. My dad is only 69. Despite the fact that I only have one remaining grandparent, my grandfather on my mother's side, that dude is going to be 90 this November. So, obviously, my dad should have another good 10-15 years in him, minimum. It’s strange how the age of "old" shifts as you get closer to it.

My dad is a great man, with a sharp wit, good sense of humor, intelligence, and infinite patience (I imagine my mom snickering now). Doubtless, he is one of the best men I have ever met.

I still ask him for advice on just about anything of importance. Just recently, I asked him about a questionable stock tip I got, and we decided to both buy a few shares and see what happened. (At the time, shares were only 14 cents each so this wasn't a truly crazy idea.)

We have a very good relationship, which I feel very lucky about given some father relationships I've been witness to. He is a friend and I enjoy his company. I like him. Above all, I am a daddy's girl, and I am not ready to lose my daddy.

Due to our own unique way of avoiding our emotional displays, I can't say these things directly to him. So, I write this post. The virtual equivalent of going to opposite ends of the house to compose ourselves.

March 27, 2006

A Birthday Tribute for My Mother

Sorry if those last two posts were harsher than expected. I wasn't sure I should post them, but then I thought that anyone reading this already knows that I have strong opinions. Then, on the way home Friday, Steve made some comment about the blog becoming a political launchpad. I will keep such things few and far between.

And so, onto the regular programming, I offer this comic strip that Steve sent me earlier this week.

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He didn't need to explain it at all and I just burst out laughing. You see, we truly enjoy it when my parents come to visit. We enjoy doing things with them. We enjoy their company and it gives us an opportunity to do things we don't normally do. But, from the moment a trip is planned, my mom starts saying stuff like "you don't have to entertain us" and "we don't want to be any trouble". Anytime I ask if there's something they'd like to do/see during their visit or if I dare to suggest an outing, I hear "you don't have to entertain us".

I often respond that we could just sit around and stare at each other if she'd like. At any rate, this comic reminds me of the 'rents and brought a smile to my face.

And since today is my mother's birthday, it seems like a suitable tribute. Happy birthday, Mom!